REPLY: Math of the 20-something Single Guy

Great. Math. I'm not quite sure what math, especially that of the 20-something single guy, has to do with @whatshesaid's latest blog post. You can read it HERE because I know I am, for the first time, as I write this. All I know is that under our arrangement, I must respond to hers and she must respond to mine.

Oh, I know another thing, too. I know the only math that a 20-something single guy needs to know. Equation to follow...

FFN - BT + FD = PBCF :: In other words, Funds for the Night minus Bar Tab plus Free Drinks equals Post Bar Cash Flow. It basically determines whether one can get meat on a stick or pizza from some vendor, and whether one has to sleep outside, walk home or can afford a cab.

The post-bar cash flow equation is the most important and always calculated first. The answer is the basis and variable for any and all other equations. For example...

PBCF = PBF+ CH +/- (NFC) = NoD/HoD :: Post-Bar Cash Flow is equal to Post-Bar Food plus Cab Home plus or minus No Fat Chicks which is equal to the Number of Drinks divided into the Hours of Drinking. In other words, the amount of money left over will determined if you can eat and afford a cab home, with or without a girl that you picked up, preferably no fat chicks, which will be determined by how many drinks you have over the hours you're out. In laymans terms, with enough booze, the girls who don't look so good at 12 o'clock, look pretty good come the end of the night.

After closer inspection, though, I realize she isn't writing about anything of the sort.

In her post she says that the rule, rather than the exception is that guys who seem worth getting to know are always just visiting. Guess what, dear, so are many of the girls. It's not that they are just visiting, they're also taken. Trust me, guys go through the exact same thing.

Let me begin by answering her question, if there are any 20-something single guys in this city worth dating.

Answer: Yes.

Problem: Solved.

My good deed for the day: Check.

Secondly, let me point out that in her list of types of guys (go read it), she has put me at the top of her list: Good-looking + Great Job = Douchebag (Follow this link to see an earlier post in defense of douchebags) You shouldn't have. That's all that I have to say about that.

Thirdly, let me point out that she admits to saying that she doesn't want to settle down until she is 35. Before I go any further, there is nothing wrong with this, not just for her, but for anyone else out there - male or female - who has the same desire. What I will say is be careful.

While many of you may be in no rush, there are those out there who want something more. Knowing what you want is great, but letting someone else know that you have no intentions of really settling down for years to come...that, you may want to put out there.

Ladies, guys in their late-20s and early 30-s are most likely looking to settle down. If you have no desire to any time soon, speak up. It's only fair. There are those of us out there who want families, kids, the whole white picket fence. We don't want to invest time in someone who knows off the bat, that they don't want any of that until years and years down the road.

I also can't get behind her theory. I won't recite it, scroll up to the link and go read it for yourself. While it sounds great in theory...and may I add, she doesn't have any cool equations to back it up...she forgets to factor in an important detail: children.

I'm not going to get into it in this post. I have one coming all about it. I'll only say that the older we all get, children, or the desire to have increases exponentially, or decreases drastically. It might sound great that there will be a bunch of divorced people running around for us all, but it may not be as cut and dry for many of us who want or don't want kids after a certain age.

So where does this leave us? 

Like she says, could she pick one of those guys? Yes. Will she? No, because she has no intentions of settling down any time soon.

Ladies, where does this leave the rest of you? Sit around and wait and it may be too late. Act too soon and get hurt?

If you want to meet a guy who is a mixture of every type she described, which is what it seems most women want, look beyond where you're looking. I'm not going to do all the work for you, but here are three venues to check out.

1) The gym is a great place to meet people, but not your Good Life or Nubodys or other massive chain gym. Sign up to a community gym, or a campus gym if you can. At these gyms, 99 per cent of people - mostly guys - are there to just work out. They're not there to strut around in the latest gym wear, trying to lift their max weight for one rep to impress you. They'll spend more time between sets staring off into space than staring at you. They want to get in and get out. Most are also single. Who else works out at 7 or 8 pm?

2) Volunteering is another place. Although more women than men tend to volunteer, any guy coming through who is single obviously has time to kill. Just make sure he's volunteering by choice and it's not part of his community service.

3) And finally, a book club. This may be hit or miss on the type of guy that you want, but you'll know two things off the bat, a) He's intelligent enough to read and b) You'll learn about his interests and if you mesh indirectly, because you'll be forced into discussion and conversation.

While many of you may be thinking the same thing @whatshesaid was thinking, keep in mind that most of the time, us guys are looking at you and thinking, are there any girls worth dating?